Culture Clash

Culture Clash                                                           rev. November 3, 2013

 
Trembling, tear stained
choking on bitterness
afraid to sleep
demons lying in wait
taunting her for a fool
chiding her for every well earned tear
laughing at her delusions.
no kick ass bounce back dime a dozen old news with it graduate of the love ‘em and leave ‘em school of romance,
culture shock overtaking a late bloomer, upright and ignorant, acquiring new vocabulary,  emotions overwhelming inbred propriety, rational civility, well honed modesty
Misplaced passions escaping the iron bars of habitual morality;
stored and forgotten,  left to ripen,  savoring freedom, generating their own brand of courage and strength
abandoning common wisdom for the uncommon illogical magnetic pull
of forbidden love in faraway places,
desire fueled by desire, emotion trumping reality,  surreal,  
the stuff of mid day soaps, bosom baring paperback novels
and Shakespearean tragedy.

If We Could

This would  be so simple
if I could say it’s been good to know ya hunny and turn my back
and creep  back into my dusty corner.

If it brought you happiness
I would wiggle my nose and disappear… and a tiny butterfly
would land on yours – erasing my memory from the hard drive in your head.

You would be free of me forever
No crazy poet to disturb your tranquility
To tell you how much she loves you and wants you.

 If I could.

Common sense has no role 
as a means to the end
of the uncommon connection between us.

 Busy days with endless details
fail  to crowd out thoughts of you
and the eager anticipation of feeling your presence.

We drift we collide we bide our time
A struggle ongoing, edging toward resolution
Ominous and inevitable 

I cling to the certainty
That this is not yet over
Despite the ought tos, the should haves and the must nots.

 
It is not possible to contain the ephemeral.
The only way to resolve this fantastical dilemma
Is to act out the fantasy and make it real

You won’t be my friend
I won’t be your enemy
But I would be your lover

If you could…

Hope’s Alchemy

It will happen one day,  not tomorrow.
But tomorrow I will close my eyes and
I will embrace the dream not hold it off
With shaking tearful fears and doubts..
Welcoming – opening my arms,
my heart, accepting you into my soul.
And one day,  not tomorrow
but one day before this earth
completes another journey ’round its sun
we will be together
To complete what began with teasing winks and  tempting smiles
–years before –maybe-a hundred years before.
Was there ever a time
you were not known to my heart?

Overcome by powerful feelings,
Unspoken words, unanswered desires
needing hope to perform its alchemy
and turn bitter tears sweet.
With certainty that this feeling echoes and grows
rounded with common caring and desire
Mutual fears matched by shared hopes fuel growing passion.
Dreams are redefined with shape and substance to
mold the doubtful fantasy
Turning ephemeral whimsy
into fiercely wished for reality.
Using all remedy
and means of resource.
One day soon, in this lifetime.

December 22, 2011, revised February 11, 2013

Autumn Memories and Magical Threads

Along the Rhine – October 2012

The magic continues
The spinner weaves a fragile thread
Taken to tangles and knots
Requiring a gentle patient touch.

We are connected by a magical thread.
Sometimes the filament frays –
when confusion clouds the perception of action or inaction.
Tenuous attachments attract uncertainty.

Fantasy, illusion, dreams – all is good –
Reality is often hard pressed to keep pace with the mind’s alternative universe.
Especially when that universe is shared
with the embodiment of remembered yearning.

A vivid memory of crisp breezes carrying wispy scent of hearth and embers.
Dusk falling rapidly as I briskly walked the few blocks home –
dodging puddles and reveling – charging through piles of crunchy maple leaves
randomly adorning the sidewalk.

Utter joy with the sensory symphony –
for the moment tenuously overriding
the swell of angst rising from my depths.
A nameless yearning. Strong sense of something missing.

Feeling such a longing to reach out and touch
the someone who was striving to do the same from parts unknown.
Continuing my walk home and
turning my thoughts to the evening’s plan.

Yet, down deep inside knowing that the longing would continue,
the vague sense of disquiet would go unappeased.
Until the shadows took on form emerging from the hidden realm
and the wonder of recognition became reality.

Ambushed

 steps

the days pass
succumbing to routine,
lulled by the familiar.
quiet mind
stillness of soul  

tonight
missing you
persistent longing
overtaken
overwhelmed

 

ambushed by
emotions
sneaking through
a strengthened connection…
intense steady pull.
 

a sigh of understanding…
resolution does not reside
in avoidance
Open up and
embrace the inevitable.