If We Could

This would  be so simple
if I could say it’s been good to know ya hunny and turn my back
and creep  back into my dusty corner.

If it brought you happiness
I would wiggle my nose and disappear… and a tiny butterfly
would land on yours – erasing my memory from the hard drive in your head.

You would be free of me forever
No crazy poet to disturb your tranquility
To tell you how much she loves you and wants you.

 If I could.

Common sense has no role 
as a means to the end
of the uncommon connection between us.

 Busy days with endless details
fail  to crowd out thoughts of you
and the eager anticipation of feeling your presence.

We drift we collide we bide our time
A struggle ongoing, edging toward resolution
Ominous and inevitable 

I cling to the certainty
That this is not yet over
Despite the ought tos, the should haves and the must nots.

 
It is not possible to contain the ephemeral.
The only way to resolve this fantastical dilemma
Is to act out the fantasy and make it real

You won’t be my friend
I won’t be your enemy
But I would be your lover

If you could…

Beyond Reason

Sometimes you have to write the words.

Staring at your folly in print

may make it disappear.

Exposing your errant thoughts

to the light of day

casts a new reality.

Take new notice

of the ground beneath your feet.

 

Sometimes I write the words

Because I have no choice

When thoughts of you linger

all day

and all evening

and yesterday too.

What is this?

How can it possibly be this way?

 

Your care for me has vanished

along with you.

I struggle to accept this in vain.

Who are you

to invade my mind

all my waking hours?

What power do you possess

that I succumb to my lunatic thoughts?

 

I gave so much of myself

because that’s what I needed to do.

You were ever accepting

and my fears abated.

And I believed

you would keep the fragments safe,

not throw them to the wind

like yesterday’s ashes.

 

And now

my broken record of pain and tears

continues.

No end in sight

I am so lost.

Part of me is gone forever.

One loss too many,

the final blow.

The ironic and dreadful thought

that I may have caused this

with enthusiasm mistaken for demands

and confusion prompting angry words.

Is it too late to recapture

the give and take of a sincere friend?

To support and be uplifted

by someone who truly cares?