Tag Archives: poem

by

I’ll Have a Warm Sweater

I’ll Have a Warm Sweater 

you’ll know where to find me
I’ll be the one studying the shapes of the stones that line the dirt at the side of the road
I’ll be frowning
I’ll have a warm sweater to combat the chill coming from inside
shreds of sodden tissue spilling from the stretched out pockets
you know what I’ll be seeking
I’ll be desperately trying to regain meaning
lost without my shadow friend
going through the motions
leaden arms, sightless eyes, frozen heart
you won’t be able to see me
I have become invisible
trying to find myself
without you there is no me
suspended in time unloved, unfeeling, unmissed

 

by

Culture Clash

Culture Clash                                                           rev. November 3, 2013

 
Trembling, tear stained
choking on bitterness
afraid to sleep
demons lying in wait
taunting her for a fool
chiding her for every well earned tear
laughing at her delusions.
no kick ass bounce back dime a dozen old news with it graduate of the love ‘em and leave ‘em school of romance,
culture shock overtaking a late bloomer, upright and ignorant, acquiring new vocabulary,  emotions overwhelming inbred propriety, rational civility, well honed modesty
Misplaced passions escaping the iron bars of habitual morality;
stored and forgotten,  left to ripen,  savoring freedom, generating their own brand of courage and strength
abandoning common wisdom for the uncommon illogical magnetic pull
of forbidden love in faraway places,
desire fueled by desire, emotion trumping reality,  surreal,  
the stuff of mid day soaps, bosom baring paperback novels
and Shakespearean tragedy.

by

The Saboteur

DL at nightThe Saboteur

Weeks, months, years passed
First encounter imminent
Impulsive and thoughtless
I undermined it all

Acting on a whim,
no thought to repercussions
driven by a wish to surprise
and a spirit of adventure.

These stated motives
suffer under closer scrutiny.
Did fear direct my actions?
Or an unstated need prevail?

What did I fear?
That the reality of your touch
would fall short of my fantasy?
Or that I would disappoint you?

Predictable fears yet
deep inside I knew
that was not how it would play out
and that scared me to death.

I didn’t know it at the time,
It took some contemplation
soul searching, uncovering truths:
I feared I would never let you go.

That I would fall completely in love
with the reality of you in my arms
and never want to leave your side
and our worlds would turn upside down.

And reality and fantasy would merge
this new world unrecognizable
To either you or me
And ‘though we loved, we would lose our selves.

So we retreat to fantasy
And I still want you
And long for your touch
And am yours for always.

by

The Right Thing

When I can look into your eyes
brush my fingertips across your cheek
and breathe in your reality
only then will I know 
the right thing to do.
Right for you
right for me
and throw off doubts and questions.
 
Plans are presented in black and white
limited to logistical concerns.
Our unknowns will flounder
beyond the scope of micro management
to be revealed and resolved
at a time and in a manner 
subject to the pressures of fate.
 
I will succumb to the power of the tide
and not fight the errant wind
If that is where my inner muse directs me.
No script to follow – I’ll listen to my heart.
No finger wagging critics – internal or external
to censure 
And I’ll know it is right.
Hummingbird enjoying breakfast

 

by

My Shadow Man

stepsTwenty years ago I dreamed of  friends in places we had been together laughing.
I thought that everyone was there but someone was missing I didn’t know who it was just that he was missing.
I thought I spied his shadow and ran up  steps to look but no one was there and I had no explanation for my friends

just that someone was missing I don’t know who I thought I saw his shadow but now it’s disappeared.

A decade ago I dreamed of other friends in other places we had played together laughing and singing songs and everyone was there but someone was missing.
I didn’t know who it was just that he was missing and I couldn’t find him.
my elusive shadow man my dream-time lover.
I ran into the garden thinking I heard his footsteps but no one was there and I was left with a vague yearning for someone I

did not know who he was just that I longed to find him.

Last night I dreamed of you and when I saw your face I knew beyond just knowing  that you were my nameless shadow man the focus of countless dreams always just out of reach.
and now I know who it was that I sought with outstretched arms and longing soul twenty years and a decade ago.
but you and I have never been together laughing or playing or singing songs and you are still missing from my arms but now not from my heart.
now I know who you are that you are real that I have finally found my missing friend.

And with that, a lingering conundrum unexplained phenomenon
We’ve never met but I know you almost better than myself.
We’ve never touched but your presence next to me is as real as the tree outside my window.
We’ve never spoken but I hear your voice throughout the day.
We’ve never kissed but I know the taste of your lips.
You will always be my dream-time lover, my elusive shadow man.